Dealing with Bullies

Dealing with Bullies

One day, Charlies' teacher, Ms. Friz had taught the class about five types of way to handle conflicts. She had explained how people can disagree, and that there are different ways to solve problems. So, Charlie paid close attention so he could find a way to stand up for himself.

The first approach was avoiding. Avoiding means staying away from a problem instead of dealing with it. At first, Charlie tried this approach. He moved to a different table and played in another part of the playground. This helped him feel better for a little while, but George continued to bother him. Charlie realized that avoiding the problem was not making it go away.

The second approach was accommodating. This means letting the other person have their way to keep the peace. One morning, George asked to use Charlies' favorite green pencil and refused to give it back. Charlie let him keep it because he did not want to argue. Although this stopped an argument, Charlie felt unhappy. He learned that being kind is important, but he should not always give up what matters to him just to make someone else happy.

The third approach was competing. Competing means standing up for what you want, even when the other person wants something different. The next time George teased him, Charlie took a deep breath and said, “Stop teasing me. I don’t like it, and I deserve to be treated kindly.” Charlie spoke firmly without yelling or hitting. George looked surprised because Charlie had never spoken up before. Charlie felt proud that he had stood up for himself. He also understood that competing too much could turn a small disagreement into a bigger fight.

The fourth approach was compromising. This means that both people give up a little to find a solution. During art class, Charlie and George both wanted to use the same-colored paint. Instead of fighting, Charlie suggested, “How about we take turns? You can use them first, and then I’ll use them.” George agreed. They both got a chance to use the paints, and the problem was solved.

Finally, Charlie decided to try the fifth approach, collaborating. This means working together to find a solution that made both people happy. One afternoon, Charlie walked over to George and said, "I want us to get along, but it hurts my feelings when you tease me. Is something bothering you? Maybe we can figure out how to be friends instead of fighting." George then feels embarrassed saying how, "no one wants to be his friend and that the only way he gets noticed is from the jokes he makes about Charlie." He had then apologized. Charlie then accepted their apology and they made up.

Over the next few weeks, George treated Charlie with more kindness, and Charlie learned more about what George liked. They became good friends and discovered that they had much more in common than they had expected. When they disagreed, they tried to talk things through instead of hurting each other's feelings.

Charlie learned that every conflict is different and that choosing the right approach can make a big difference. Sometimes people need space, sometimes they need to stand up for themselves, and sometimes they need to work together. Most importantly, Charlie learned that being brave does not mean being mean, and being a good friend does not mean letting someone hurt you.