More Than Just High School

More Than Just High School

After graduating from high school, five best friends, Helia, Amara, Valentina, Vienna, and Isabel, were excited to start a new chapter. They had been best friends for years and were used to seeing each other almost every day. They would get food after school, go shopping, and spend hours talking about anything and everything. Before college started, they promised that things wouldn't change between them. They even made plans to hang out during the summer before everyone got busy.

Once college started, things slowly changed. Everyone had different schedules, classes, and responsibilities. Helia was especially busy because she was going to college, working, and spending time with her new boyfriend. After a few weeks, Helia stopped showing up to hangouts and rarely replied to the group chat. At first, the girls didn't think much of it. They figured out she was just busy and would come around eventually. But as more time passed, they started to wonder if something else was going on.

One Friday night, Amara sent a message in the group chat asking if everyone wanted to get dinner. Valentina replied right away, Vienna and Isabel said they were free. Helia didn't answer. "Has anyone heard from Helia lately?" Isabel asked. "Not really," Vienna replied. "Every time we ask her to hang out, she says she's busy." Amara wasn't sure what to think. She knew everyone was busy with college, but she also noticed that Helia hadn't been texting them like she used to. They missed their friend, but instead of asking Helia what was happening, they began coming up with their own explanations.

As the days passed, the girls started getting frustrated with Helia. Whenever she couldn't hang out or didn't respond to the group chat, they took it personally. "Honestly, I feel like she only wanted to be friends with us in high school," Isabel said. "Ever since she got a boyfriend, she barely talks to us," Valentina added. Amara thought Helia might have a reason for being distant. The girls started assuming Helia no longer cared about their friendship. This created a negative communication climate because they were judging her without knowing the whole story.

Amara decided she didn't want to keep guessing about Helia. That evening, she sent her a message asking if everything was okay. Helia eventually told her, "I'm sorry I've been distant. I've just had a lot going on lately." Amara told her that the girls missed her and were starting to think she didn't want to be friends anymore. Amara felt relieved. She asked Helia if they could talk on the phone, and Helia agreed. Instead of blaming Helia, Amara gave her a chance to explain herself. This was the first step toward having a more supportive conversation.

That night, Amara and Helia talked on the phone. "Honestly, I'm overwhelmed," Helia explained. "I have college assignments, work, bills to pay, and my new relationship. By the time I get home. I'm exhausted. I haven't been able to balance everything," she said as she cried over the phone. Amara listened and explained that the girls thought Helia was choosing her boyfriend over everything. Helia sounded upset. "That's not true. I miss you guys too. I just haven't had much time, and I should've communicated better." They agreed that Helia would talk to the whole group.

The next day, all five girls talked together. Helia explained how busy she had been and apologized for not keeping in touch. Valentina admitted, "I thought you didn't want to hang out with us." Helia reassured them that she would never do that. Amara explained that she was glad they finally talked about the problem instead of continuing to guess. They decided to plan study dates and get together whenever their schedules allowed. They also agreed to check in with each other, even when they were busy. This helped them create a supportive communication climate.

Over the next few weeks, the girls started meeting at coffee shops to study and occasionally going out. Helia was still busy, but she made more of an effort to let them know when she couldn't hang out. The other girls also stopped assuming the worst whenever someone was unavailable. Looking back at it, they realized their friendship had been almost damaged by a misunderstanding. Helia learned that communicating, even with a quick message, could prevent hurt feelings. The other girls learned that someone being distant doesn't always mean they no longer care.